Network, Network, Network!!!

This weekend I have a veterinary conference I am going to so that I "can get continuing education hours". But really, my sole purpose is to network and get my butt a job!
So many veterinary technicians are lazy, introverted, and (sorry to say) ugly. Haha! I am so mean, but I swear it's true!
This is my first conference I have ever been to, but I think landing a job will be a piece of cake. I am therefore not your typical veterinary technician!
So... wish me luck! I'm going to need it!

Scar on my heart

I can only blame myself for these recent things.
There are some people on this earth who's sole purpose is to get what they want regardless of the scars they leave behind.
I am so afraid people I love will be severely hurt if they find out.
This is a scar on my heart that I must hide.
I want all of this to go away so I can start anew.
Sometimes you must smile, even in the worst of times.
Things will get better, I just know it.

Dissapointed....in myself.

Well....Still haven't heard from the job interview.
Why would you interview someone if you weren't going to make a decision right away.
When I called the lady to "check up" she said that "They were busy and haven't had time to make a decision. Okay?!?!
I went out with one of my best friends, Ashley, on Thursday. I made a big mistake and then lied to Ashley about it.
I made a promise with someone who said they would keep their big mouth shut about and they told ASHLEY'S HUSBAND! WTF?
I don't think I will ever make a promise with anyone ever again.
I regret the whole thing and I feel like a shit bad for lying to Ashley.
I am so embarrassed.
I don't even know what to do about it.
I just have to come clean with her even though she already knows the truth.
I want to put all of this behind me and pretend it NEVER happened.
Stay away from Army boys.... they're nothing but trouble.
I am so thankful I have Mark.

Big Week

So this is what it all comes down to. This is the "big week" for me! It's almost scary to think how much my life is going to change in one week!
Tomorrow I will be attending a continuing education seminar for a Veterinary Pet Insurance Company that is also offering "alternative careers for Veterinary Technicians". It could be a job that is right up my alley!
But on the other hand.... I have a job interview on Thursday that I am so excited about! The job interview is making it hard for me to concentrate on the seminar I am attending tomorrow.
Who knows, I could totally have a shitty interview on Thursday and the insurance job could save me... maybe.
I just have to keep all of my options open and network.
Then on Monday.... I GRADUATE!!!!!
School will be so nice to have behind me, for now at least!

Selfishness + Job Hunting = Sucess?!?!

So, I've decided to not worry so much as to what my boyfriend is doing with his life and just concentrate on mine. I know the way he was raised, and I know if I get a really good job he will feel an extreme obligation to step it up a notch. For him the man always made more money and that is important to him. Where in my family, the woman was the main "bread winner". I wouldn't mind having the man being the main bread winner, I'd actually love it! What sane woman wouldn't want it that way? Ha!
So... I've applied to a couple different places with just hope that I'll get a job I can be happy with. I am also scheduled to go to a seminar that is going to be discussing career opportunities for a company I am interested in applying for.
One of the places I applied for with just my dumb luck sent me an email the very next day after I sent a letter with my interest in the position they were hiring for. They were actually interested in my resume! Wow! So I immediately sent my resume. I waited a week with no response. So another half a week rolls by and I decide to send them an email asking if they had time to review my resume... but I forgot! So that very night I got a voicemail on my phone from the company wanting to set up an interview next week! How bizarre is that!?!? So I am so happy and excited to go on this interview! This job is to be a representative for a well know animal related company. There will be quite alot of traveling for this job which is pretty exciting as well! This is a international company so it could be very nice! It will be so nice to just be a professional and not a dog wrestler!
So everyone please wish me luck in my search for the "Perfect Job"! I can do it! I'll be knocking everone's socks before you know it!

Three Year Jitters?

As I previously described I am doing an internship at an emergency animal hospital located in Boulder, Colorado, and it is GREAT! I really like helping saving animals lives, it is so rewarding. The only problem is that I just don't feel passionate about it. I like it, but not even close to being passionate about it. I am starting to wonder if I can actually be passionate about anything. Can a person be born without a gene that makes them feel passionate about things? Is that even possible?
I think I could possibly enjoy getting into Veterinary Sales... so that is what I am trying to do.
I am working so hard right now I now it's going to pay off! I am interning 40 hours a week at the Emergency Hospital and working 25-30 hours a week at my other job. And let me tell you.... it is VERY overwhelming. The sad part is that I still don't have any money! What the Heck!?
My boyfriend has been paying most of our joint bills which is helping me alot. I am ever so grateful for that. I would be in big trouble otherwise!
So a little background on my boyfriend and I....
So... we have been dating for 3 years. The first two years were a grueling long distance relationship. He was in the Marine Corps and was stationed in San Diego and Iraq. After his little "stint", if you will, with the Marines he graciously moved out to Colorado to be with me. His mother protested his move like a child not getting the candy she was promised. I didn't care. For a few weeks he lived with me and my roommate until we moved to Denver and got our own place. We lived there for a year and moved to a friend of my Mom's house, Tammy, in Boulder, where we currently reside. I am not proud to be living in, what feels like, my Mom's house. It's just plain irritating. I have no desire to make it look nice or take to take pride in where I live and it's kind of depressing. I can't wait to get out. So my boyfriend does most of the cleaning and stuff. I feel bad but I also work like 65-70 hours a week. He only works about 1-2 hours a day because he doesn't have very many clients yet.
So my boyfriend's plan when he moved out here was to go to school to be a personal trainer and also a fire fighter so he could do personal training on his days off of the fire station. So he quickly started school for personal training and promptly graduated. He got hired at the place where he did his internship and only has 1-2 clients. Which is why he only work 1-2 hours a day. The rest of his he sits in front of the computer playing video games. I can't drag him away from playing this stupid game even if my life depended on it! It is ridiculous and it makes my blood boil even talking about it! He no longer has any desire to do anything! I work so much and all I want to do when I get home is to relax and spend time with him, but the video game is so much more important. He says I should tell him to just "get off the computer" but every time I do he gets so incredibly angry that I don't even bother anymore.
So I had a theory last week that maybe his is just off track and just needs a push in the right direction. Boy, was I ever wrong! I started asking him questions about him going back to school and he explained to me that he doesn't have the money to go to school because he is "in so much debt". Ha! Give me a break! All he has is 10K in school loans and 15K in car loans! Besides school loans are hardly considered "debt"! He also made comments about not being interested in becoming a fire fighter anymore, which is fine but you have to do something! You can't be a personal trainer for the rest of your life!
I just feel that I am working so hard and putting in a ridiculous amount of effort to get what I want out of life and he is just sitting on his ass playing video games. I know you must work hard for what you want!
On the other hand I really don't have too much room to talk because he is paying a majority of the bills. I think he is starting to get bitter about it though. I asked him the other day if he ever gets sick of sitting on his ass playing the same game over and over again and he muttered something about money and how he just can't go out and spend it because everything requires money. Bullshit! The other day we went hiking and that didn't cost us a dime except for gas of course!
My ex was REALLY cheap and I will not put up with it! We dated for three years and that was the end of that.
Now as Mark and I's three year anniversary is swiftly approaching, I am asking myself the same questions I did when my ex and I hit three years.
Do I have the "Three Year Jitters"? Is there such thing? Or is it just circumstantial?
I love my boyfriend, now, to death, and I HATE feeling this way.
I am starting to feel like I need someone who is more adventurous!
I have learned my lesson and will never date someone who is cheap, and/or plays video games.
I feel like I need someone who is in their career and more settled. I am over playing these silly college games. I want to start life!!!!!!
So I am just trying to figure out what his problem is or if maybe it is just me. Do I have a three year mental block? I don't know....
I guess I figure it out eventually... I'm young.....

New Blog

Today is the end of a long Monday. Currently I am completing an internship with the Boulder Emergency Pet Clinic (BEPC) in Boulder, Colorado. 40 long and drawn out hours a week are what I have to work at the BEPC. Since it is an internship, I unfortunately don't get paid. So, I must also work as many hours as humanly possible at my other job. I work at the Cheesecake Factory. It is a decent job. I have worked there for almost a year and a half. I am working about 65-70 hours a week between both jobs and it is exhausting. I only have seven more weeks of my internship and then Graduation on the 17th of March! It will be such a relief to never have to step another foot in the Bel-Rea Institute. What an awful school.
Very soon I have so many crucial life decisions. I feel like I need some serious guidance through these times. I am sorely confused and feel helpless.
...It is almost 3am and I should probably wake up my boyfriend (Who is Zzz'ing on the couch) and head to bed. G'night!
XxOo